Harry's Fairly Oddparents
by hunter81095
Summary: Orphaned, and left to fend for himself with his abusive, magic hating relatives until his eleventh birthday, seven year old Harry Potter gets a pair of fairies to help him through his troubles as he grows up, this is the tale of an abused child who gets a family, albeit an odd one, years before he would have otherwise.
1. Chapter 1

"Cosmo and Wanda! I've got your new assignment waiting!" The Austrian accented voice of Jorgen Van Strangle called the two Fairy Godparents from the waiting room they'd been sitting in. They'd had a short break period of not having a Godchild after they had been taken from Crocker, and Bill Gates not long before that, not to mention the rash of terrible godkids before that, but they'd finally had enough of a vacation, and all but demanded Jorgen give them a new godchild, they only hoped he didn't give them another one for the Hall of Infamy out of spite.

Cosmo and Wanda quickly flew after Jorgen, who handed them a file of one the "most miserable kids on the planet" that would be their charge for the next few years, and sent them on their way to the Fairy Cab before he disappeared again. Wanda led Cosmo into the cab so he wouldn't get distracted and opened the file, starting with the standard picture and name, followed by location and other information.

The boy in question was small, incredibly so in fact, and he had a pair of glasses that looked to be beaten and battered, causing Wanda to place him as a victim of bullying, but the thing that made her feel the saddest for the child was on the reasons for misery section of his file.

 **Name: Harry Potter**

 **Age: 7**

 **Sex: Male**

 **Race: Human Wizard**

 **REASONS FOR MISERY**

 **Orphaned by Dark Lord "Voldemort" due to prophecy pertaining to God child on October 31st 1981**

 **Left with Magic fearing and hating Aunt and Uncle Petunia and Vernon Dursley due to falsely accused god father being sent to wizarding prison of Azkaban on life sentence.**

 **Regularly emotionally and mentally abused by Aunt and Uncle in fits of fear and jealousy, Abused physically on rare occasions.**

 **Victim of rampant bullying from his cousin, Dudley Dursley and said cousin's "gang"**

 **Child is forced to do most of the chores around the residence, cleaning, cooking, yard work, etc.**

 **Is given very little food and is locked into the cupboard under the stairs when not working or attending school**

 **Rank of misery: 10th out of all qualified god children on Earth**.

Wanda frowned in both sadness and anger for their new Godchild, he was abused and hated by his family, because of a gift he obtained from his parents, and if she was correct, a victim of one of their previous god children. He had been worse than Maryann and was probably the only child to not have any sort of photograph in their house, in either hall. She sighed and put the folder down, explaining the situation to Cosmo in small and easily understood terms that their new Godchild was easily one of their most miserable and most deserving of Godparents, which the two of them were more than happy to provide.

"But Wanda, how are we going to introduce ourselves? He sounds like he's watched all day, and we can't be seen by his relatives or we'll be taken away before we even get to make his life any better." Cosmo asked Wanda, proving that he did have at least some tact when it comes to  
their godchildren.

"I don't know Cosmo, but we'll see once we get there. This will definitely be one of our hardest, if not more rewarding godchildren." Wanda answered, before remembering something from Da Rules. "Wait, Cosmo! He's a wizard! That means he won't have all his memories of us erased when he grows up and we have to move on!" She exclaimed happily. They hadn't had a good magical godchild in over a century!

"Alright, we're here! Number 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey!" The driver announced before hitting a button and causing their suitcases to fly out of the trunk. "Now get outta my cab!" They quickly did, and as soon as the door shut behind them, he sped off, leaving Cosmo and Wanda on the curb where they quickly transformed into squirrels before they sped off towards the window sill of the house where their new godchild lived, waiting for the chance to reveal themselves to him

* * *

Seven year old Harry Potter hoovered the living room as he tried his best to stay under the Dursley's radar, hoping that Aunt Petunia stuck to the backyard craning her horse like neck over the fence so she could find the next juicy piece of gossip, rather than coming in here and berating him as usual while praising his cousin, Dudley for whatever he was doing today.

"Probably playing video games or watching the Telly in his room" Harry said to himself as he went back over the carpet with the Hoover for the fourth time, making absolutely sure that every single speck of dust and dirt was out of the carpet and that it looked absolutely perfect, hoping in vain that he would earn lunch for his hard work.

* * *

Cosmo and Wanda watched from the window sill and frowned at the scene before them, granted this wasn't the first time that they had had an abused godchild, and it probably wouldn't be the last, but it never stopped breaking either Fairy's heart whenever they saw it. Wanda quickly poofed herself over to the backyard ensuring that the only guardian home, a horse-like woman who Wanda assumed was Petunia was busy, and after a moment's hesitation poofed up a distraction in the form of her neighbor doing something completely un-normal so the woman would stay distracted long enough for the two of them to introduce themselves before she would come in to call the rest of the neighborhood to tell them what she saw.

Wanda poofed herself back to Cosmo and nodded at him before they silenced the area around the Dursley's living room and poofed in.

* * *

Harry was just finishing up cleaning the Living room when a loud pair of poofs went off behind him, causing him to spin around and gasp at the two intruders.

One had pink hair and eyes to match, wearing a yellow shirt and black pants floating in mid air with a smile. The other had green eyes and hair, wearing a shirt, tie, and pants, with an even larger grin than the miniature woman next to him, not to mention the wings, crowns, and sticks with stars on them?

Before he could say anything, the two floated up into the air, their sticks glowing, before the woman opened her mouth,

"Hi there Harry! I'm Wanda!" She said, prompting the male to pull out a cue card before sounding it out as he read it.

"And I- am" he paused and squinted at the card before asking the woman what the next word was, causing her to face palm and mutter the word to him, before he turned back towards Harry and continued as if nothing happened, "Cosmo, and we're…"

The two floated upwards, their sticks glowing brighter before they caused a poofing sound that reverberated through the room, causing a large neon sign to pop into existence behind them proclaiming their occupation that they spoke aloud.

"Your new Fairy Godparents!"


	2. Chapter 2

Harry stared in dumbfounded shock at the scene in front of him.

"Fairy G-Godparents!?" He stuttered out, trying to wrap his head around the situation. Cosmo and Wanda smiled even bigger as they nodded before responding.

" We're here to make your life less miserable Harry!" Cosmo said insensitively, causing Wanda to smack him upside his head.

"Cosmo!" Wanda admonished him, causing him to stare at her quizzically.

"What?" He asked obliviously. Wanda facepalmed.

"Ignore my husband, he's an idiot." Wanda said, shaking her head in fond exasperation before coughing and changing the subject back to the reason they were there. "Anyway, as your Fairy Godparents we're here to grant your wishes and make you happy, so what do you say sport? What do you want to wish for?" She asked, causing Harry to stare at her with wide eyes.

"I...I..can wish for wh-whatever I-I want?" Harry asked timidly, before blushing and hiding his face in embarrassment for asking a question when he was told by the Dursleys he wasn't allowed to.

"Well there are rules Harry, but yes, you could ask for almost anything. For example we can't maim, kill, or help you cheat to win something." Wanda explained patiently, causing Harry to think while he quickly put away the hoover. He walked back in, and proceeded to look thoughtfully at the fairies as he thought, before nodding determinedly to himself and looking at the two of them.

"I wish I didn't need to live with the Dursleys anymore!" Harry said, causing the two of them to raise their wands and with a bright waving of their wands, they started to make a wondrous poo-

 _Pppppbbbbbbbttttt!_

Harry looked at the two fairies, confused at the action, having noticed that a successful action typically resulted in a _poof,_ not a well, an inappropriate sound, that even though Harry was typically afraid of making such a happy emotion around the Dursleys, he couldn't help it.

He laughed, a joyous sound that he didn't get to make enough. Still though, there was a problem that needed to be addressed here. "Why didn't it work?" Harry asked confusedly, causing Wanda to frown as she waved her wand and caused a huge tome called "Da Rules" to poof up in front of her as it opened to the correct page.

"Apparently, you living here unfortunately falls under a clause of one of the most basic rules of Fairy Godparents, _"A Fairy is not allowed to be the_ **direct** _cause of harm towards their Godchild, either through their own actions or through the wish of the Godchild."_ Wanda frowned at the page before she looked back up at Harry. "Something is keeping you here, something that marks this place as safe for you, enough so that wishing you out of here could be disastrous for your safety Harry." Wanda shook her head in sadness, knowing that this would have been one of the best things to happen to the child. "I'm sorry sport, but we can't take you away from here." Harry nodded in sad acceptance and sat on the couch before he realized something and muttered quietly, not realizing that Fairies could hear better than humans.

"You'll just turn against me as soon as Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia meet you guys anyways." Wanda felt a stab of anger in her heart at realizing the boy's words, he wasn't just mentally and emotionally abused by his guardians, they had even turned any and all potential friends against him!? Wanda felt glad for Da Rules preventing her from harming people, otherwise she wouldn't have been able to stop herself from using her magic to harm the poor excuse for humans that were charged with her and Cosmo's god child. Wanda quickly stamped out the feeling of anger and instead fueled it into her maternal instinct, quickly coming to the decision of helping this young boy grow up with a family, even if it would be a fairly odd one. But something told her that Harry wouldn't really care all that much as long as he had one to call his own.

"Actually Harry, we have to stay a secret!" Cosmo said in a dramatic whisper, even going so far as to add a " _Shhhhh!"_ to accentuate his point. Harry cocked his head to the side.

"Why do you need to stay secret?" Harry asked meekly, even though his curiosity shone through in his tone. Wanda smiled as the boy seemed to begin opening up for them, this was going along far better than she thought it would, considering the circumstances.

"Because if people knew about us, then we would be forced to leave, people aren't supposed to know about the existence of Fairies, or magic, there's no telling what could happen if people found out either existed outside of fairy tales." Wanda explained, causing her husband to pipe in with his own idea.

"We'd be slaves! Or Lab experiments!" He gasped in a rather undignified manner, "Or LAB SLAVE EXPERIMENTS!" Cosmo exclaimed loudly, heralding the patio door slamming shut behind his Aunt. Wanda and Cosmo quickly held up their wands, causing them to turn into two picture frames, one pink, the other green, before they floated themselves onto the table, behind the other, gratuitous amounts of photos of their son, leaving them barely noticeable.

"Boy, were you screaming just now?" Petunia asked in her usual snippy tone as she walked into the living room, looking down her nose at the boy before casting her eyes over the living room, looking for the smallest speck of dust that her useless freak of a nephew had undoubtedly left behind. Harry responded with a shake of the head hoping she would believe him, even though it was likely she wouldn't.

"No ma'am, I didn't scream, I'm just doing my chores, I swear" Harry responded in a desolate, pleading tone, as if begging his Aunt to believe him, even though he knew the likelihood of that happening. So thinking, he didn't notice as he muttered, "I wish you would believe me." Causing the disguised fairies to look at one another as they heard this near silent proclamation.

"Does that count?" Cosmo whispered silently to his wife. Wanda nodded in response.

"One wish coming right up!" Wanda whispered, the two fairies holding up their wands and causing their godson's guardian to blink slowly as the magic washed over her. The two nodded at each other, and went back to pretending to be picture frames.

Petunia shook her head and ignored the slightly itchy feeling behind her eyes. "Just get back to work boy, and be quiet about it, I've got people to call that are far more important than you!" Having said her piece, Petunia walked back into the hallway, and grabbed the phone from its resting place on the hook and called up Mrs. Norbert at Number 9 to tell her all about the odd display from Mrs. Richter at Number 5, completely unaware of the magic that had made her believe her nephew's claim unquestioningly.

Harry looked in stunned silence as Aunt Petunia simply walked away from the perfect opportunity to punish him or lock him in the cupboard. Curious, he walked over to the end table where Cosmo and Wanda were disguised and began dusting around them before asking the question on the tip of his tongue.

"Did you two do that?" He asked quietly, so as to not pull the attention of his Aunt away from her telephone call. Wanda looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Of course we did sport, you said the words I, and Wish, therefore we granted it." Wanda said in a motherly tone laced with amusement. Harry smiled slightly, just within view of the two disguised fairies, causing Wanda to feel a surge of happiness at the small boy's reaction. She decided that she was going to make it even more of her own personal goal to make this child smile as much as possible. She also noticed Cosmo's oblivious look, as if he didn't quite get the point of the conversation, she would have to explain it him later, she thought to herself.

Meanwhile Harry continued dusting, a pensive expression on his face as he did so, before he looked up and opened his mouth to ask the question, but only got so far as, "Why-" before he shook his head and continued dusting, as the first rule of living with the Dursleys came into effect once again.

Don't ask questions.

A creed he'd been forced to live by for years, hence sending him into the annals of his local library, seeing it as something other than a safe space from Dudley and his gang, a place to actually answer his questions. However he was fairly sure they didn't have books to explain his situation, just like they didn't have books to explain his weirdness.

So said, Harry quickly ignored the curious side of himself and went back to dusting, not noticing the disappointed look that washed over Wanda's face as he willfully ignored the gnawing need to know more about the two new people in his life.

He mostly hoped they had living arrangements made. His cupboard was cramped as it was, he didn't want to see what that meant for the fairies, as he highly doubted they'd be happy rooming with a freak like him. So thinking, he let out a small sigh and continued over to the mantle where he began dusting the multiple pictures of his cousin, Aunt, and Uncle as he once again clamped down on his curiosity, followed by his long practiced technique of ignoring the longing in his heart at the pictures of his relatives appearing happy and content with each other, as he wasn't in a single one of these pictures. Who could blame them for not wanting him to be seen? He was a "freak" after all.

"Harry-" Wanda began, poofing back into her regular form along with Cosmo. Harry stopped cleaning immediately and turned to her with his eyes facing downward subserviently. The fairies felt a pang of sadness run through them at this blatant show of abuse, followed by their paternal instincts going full bore. Wanda took a breath before continuing her sentence, making sure to sound soothing and motherly. "Harry, you're free to ask us anything you like, we won't be mad at you." She could almost feel the jolt of excitement that ran through their godchild's mind with that statement, her happiness at this was dimmed though, when she saw something in her godchild's eye that she never liked seeing.

Distrust. Wariness. Fear.

He was afraid that they were lying to him, looking for a reason to hurt him, or embarrass him. Which, after looking at the information packet they were given on him, made perfect sense. That however, didn't make it hurt any less. Wanda flew over to him, running one of her hands through the boy's hair, inwardly sighing when he flinched. "It's okay sport, ask away, if our word isn't enough for you, then," Wanda raised her wand and poofed up "Da Rules" once again, allowing it to flip to the very first page (after a fifteen page "Table of Contents"), she cleared her throat before speaking, "A Fairy Godparent can _never, under any circumstances, harm their godchild(ren), in any way, shape or form._ " Harry could hear the italics in her speech before she flipped the book around to show him the rule itself.

Wanda smiled sadly as her new godson read the words, then looked up hopefully at Cosmo and Wanda. The look on his face nearly broke her heart, but it soared for joy the second he seemed to steel himself, openly looking at them with an expression of pure, unadulterated _hope._ "Why did I become your Godchild?" He asked, confusion chief among the emotions on his face. "There must be people more deserving of you than me."

Wanda smiled at him, ' _Not many were'_ she thought darkly, "It doesn't matter sport, what does matter, is that we're here now, it's our job to make you happy." She hugged him lightly, ignoring the flinch he gave at the feel of physical affection before he tentatively wrapped his arms around her.

Harry reveled in the feeling of affection that was radiating off of Wanda in waves, he knew she wasn't lying to him, and while it did make him feel guilty that he didn't trust them until he'd seen a rule saying they couldn't hurt him, he somehow knew that Cosmo and Wanda didn't care.

Harry smiled, a true, real smile, for the first time in years as Cosmo whisper yelled, "Group hug!", and tackled them both, causing a giggle to rise from his throat.

Yes, he may have been stuck at the Dursleys, but Cosmo and Wanda were just what he needed, the two of them were a balm to his soul that had him practically giddy with glee, and he couldn't help but love them both.

 **A/N: So, sorry about the wait, but there other stories I was working on as well. I saw this sitting in my Google Drive, and I felt kinda bad about not releasing a new chapter, so I decided to hurry up and finish this chapter off.**

 **I plan on maybe one chapter with a few time skips, as it would be annoyingly hard to write four years worth of adventures before he even reached Hogwarts.**

 **See ya next time!**


End file.
